Have you ever lived your life with the recognition that being special or worthy will somehow make things better? We have thoughts of grandeur or likeability that can be healthy but depending on the place they’re coming from they can also be toxic to our hearts and souls. Our ego is the voice within us that desires self-destruction and self-sabotage. It is the mind’s way of building dissociative walls that create identities that don’t really align with our common values. When we live our lives this way we’re essentially experiencing cognitive dissonance, this cognitive dissonance creates a wall of separation that disables us from authentically connecting with others.
When we’re living our lives through ego sometimes it can feel like we’re unconsciously walking through life. I know that when I am living in my ego it is usually when I am feeling the most tension and judgment towards others. Typically, my ego takes the shape of little thoughts about my environment and people within my environment. These thoughts perpetuate negativity within myself and the perception of negativity within others. When I am not living my life in present awareness and appreciation of myself, I tend to think about my life from a negative point of view. I experience what is called, “cognitive distortions,” and it can be as simple as the following:
“Wow, those shoes are really nice. I bet that she has a lot of family money and she didn’t actually have to work for that.”
When we look at these unconscious thoughts they seem harmless at first, right? However, without taking control and looking deeper at what they actually mean about our own self-esteem these thoughts can lead to a lot of damage in our personal lives.
The point is when we’re looking at others and judging them, we’re ultimately judging at ourselves. Because the truth is, I wanted those shoes, and I was judging myself for not being able to purchase the shoes for myself. That is why practicing forgiveness is one of the most important steps in transforming your heart for good.
Cognitive distortions are some of the most prominent and realistic psychological manifestations we have. Negativity is real and not to sound like a complete and total hippy but our “vibes” are made of these distortions. So, we have a choice to choose between love and hate. We have a choice to stop judging others for the sake of loving ourselves. When we have the capability to drop our ego and realize every single person is the same ball of energy light and love we’re ultimately able to finally see ourselves for the truth.